You can tell quite a bit from people’s profiles, although it is difficult to  write (which is one of the reasons I did a funny one plus it said nothing about me) and a lot of guys like to play safe. More than one says ” I like staying in/going out, watching a dvd cuddling by the open fire,  70`s/80`s music,  have 2/3/4 kids who I think the world of  but my favourite has to be “I’m more fun than your ex!!” I can’t possibly comment on that statement but what a statement to make. And everyone goes to the gym, but I’m not convinced.

Insistent Doesn’t Cut It.

As I’m on the subject of messages I recall a guy called “Gary” (names have been changed to protect the guilty) from Blackpool. He messaged me and as this was early on I replied which gave him what he thought was a green light. He said he’d meet me anytime, drive anywhere, not a problem, but to be polite I said I was looking for someone in my area as I didn’t drive so it would be unfair to expect him to drive to Manchester. He insisted this was not a problem, I insisted it was unfair. “You’ve not even given our love a chance!! I’m coming to Manchester!!” he insisted. “Gary it is not a good idea as I am really looking for someone in my area!” He was not put off. “Well I don’t care what you think I’m coming to Manchester!”  Really? Is that what you think Gary? “Ok I’ve been polite but this is how it is. you’re blocked.” Needless to say our romance is over.

Not Sure This Is For Me.

As I’m stretched out reclining on my favourite bit of rock as I’m a mermaid and I’m not fishing for anyone, another couple of messages I’ve had come to mind. I received one once from a guy who called himself “Barking Mad” the clue is most definitely  in the name. I checked his profile and he had quite a few pics of himself doing what he probably thinks are mad crazy things. One of his pics  was in the snow with his summer clothes on and  another of him in a dustbin  Anyway he messaged a couple of times and as by now I realised  that there’s no point replying unless you’re interested I ignored them. The fourth message was abrupt. “Who do you think you are? You’re not worthy of being in a relationship with me!” I chose to ignore it and then I had another one. “At least have some manners and reply!” so I did. “I think you might be a bit too wild and wacky for me I’m afraid.” He sent his reply ” Explain! Don’t go quiet like 90% of women on here.” but I ignored it.  After a couple more messages (some people don’t know when to shut up) I decided to reply. ” I’ve not been on this site for long but I’ve realised if I message someone and they don’t reply it’s because they’re not interested. Have some dignity and as for having no manners it is in fact YOU with no manners as you’re the one bombarding someone with abusive messages!” Needless to say our romance is over…

When You’re In The 99% Shallow Club.

Hi peeps I’m not sure if all of you realise the age group of my would be suitors. We’re looking at between 48 and 55 yrs old. Hopefully the younger end but let’s face it most men when they get older want someone younger than themselves so that explains why I seem to be attracting  over 60’s.  That said women seem to age better than men so some of these guys could be mistaken for fossils, anyway after posting my profile (and pics) I waited for messages. At first I replied to all of them, not knowing the rules (obviously) and I was being polite believe me I soon stopped that! One or two were a bit upset after sending me a message and I hadn’t replied quick enough. One guy even said “You are now officially in my 99% shallow club” Wow, and guess what I still didn’t reply! So the next day he sent another message. “Sorry about that but I’ve been messed around on this site can we start again?”  After a couple of days I had yet another message from him as apparently I was messing him about, I was shallow and he didn’t want to know anymore so I let him have it. “Excuse me for not replying within the hour but it’s difficult when I’m working as some of us don’t have the luxury of being able to be on our computer 24 hours a day which has probably been paid for with your incapacity benefits but you are now unable to message me as you’ll find you’re blocked.” And that was that.